PoliticalTalk

Universal Healthcare Hurts: It Costs Too Much in Taxes and Downgrades Service

Son: All republicans seem to do is say "No!" Some democrats are at least trying to provide universal healthcare, and all republicans do is block their efforts. Bush even vetoes covering more children's healthcare! How can you support a party that won't support the millions out there who don't have coverage?

Dad: Some not covered are non-citizens. Half are between jobs and will be out of care for less than four months. A third of them have household incomes over $50,000 and could pay for some coverage. Some can't find or afford care; they deserve the government programs that are available. The magic word is "universal." There's a big difference between helping people in poverty and extending benefits to people who could pay themselves.

Son: We spend more on healthcare than any other country. They have universal care in Canada and parts of Europe, and they spend less.

Dad: You've been reading. Single-payer systems have different costs-long lines for service, months-long delays for important, necessary procedures and operations, and the rationing that inevitably occurs when government's takeover healthcare. Many of those same countries are now finding that they can't afford their plans. They're also finding it's hard to take back what they've already promised. Their citizens complain about their systems. You don't read about it here, but in the UK, they're facing the prospect of adding income taxes to pay for healthcare. Some in the Labor party are even talking about privatization. Many end up coming here for life-saving surgery and pay for it themselves. Look, saying "no" isn't popular with teens or citizens!

Son: But our system isn't working!

Dad: Yes, healthcare has its problems, but the solutions that expand the scope and cost of government will just make it worse. Our governor says he's a Republican, but it's getting harder and harder to prove it. Most rank-and-file Republicans want smaller government, not more entitlements. Unfortunately, he may get the votes he needs, but Californians will end up the losers. We'll be saddled with another entitlement we can't afford, and more businesses will be chased out of the state.   

Son: It won't cost that much.

Dad: Programs never cost what the politicians promise. Over time you learn that every election is an advance auction sale of stolen goods; the politicians' promises today are the higher taxes of tomorrow! People want it all, but they want someone else to pay for it. They don't just want healthcare insurance; they want quality healthcare for next to nothing! Before you vote, realize that these politicians just keep borrowing on your generation's credit card. You're the ones who will get the brunt of the bill.

Son: How'd this happen?

Dad: Usually, insurance is meant for extraordinary circumstances, the big problems. You don't use car insurance to pay for oil changes or gasoline; it's there to protect you if you have an accident or your car is stolen. You don't use homeowners' insurance to pay your electricity and water bills; you have it as protection in case of fire or other catastrophes. So you shop for the best deal you can get on insurance with the deductible you can handle, and then you take care of paying for the other costs yourself. It makes you shop for the best deals you can get, because it's your money you're spending!

Son: Healthcare is different.

Dad: They've made it different. People have been spoiled by politicians and corporations that have over-promised and now can't afford it. People have come to demand the best care, and they rebel at paying even a small deductible or co-payment. Obviously, any insurance policy that promises to cover every small, ordinary expense makes everything more expensive. 

Son: Why?

Dad: The biggest reason is simple supply and demand. By reducing the patient's out-of-pocket costs and making treatment less costly to the patients, it just increases the demand for doctors and hospitals. When there aren't enough doctors to meet the demand, the costs go up. Then those paying-the corporations and government-want more accountability to control costs. Soon doctors and other medical personnel are spending more time handling paperwork and complying with regulations. That just makes the costs rise higher. Oh, then you start suing people because care isn't perfect; that adds litigation and judgment costs as well as unnecessary tests and procedures to protect the butts of those providing care. 

Son: Access to good care is what counts!

Dad: Good care is what it should be about. But with the single-payer, public service model, the doctor's contractual commitment isn't with his patient; it's with the state. When doctors are independent contractors offering their services directly to patients, their livelihood is dependent on the quality and availability of care they provide. We've almost destroyed that relationship.

Son: If you are so smart, what would you do?

Dad: That's a conversation for tomorrow. I've got to get to work to pay for the standard of living you've come to expect.

Byline: Dr. Terry Paulson is a psychologist, speaker, author and host to the PoliticalTalk Blog. This column first appeared in the Ventura County Star, November 26, 2007, B-6.

Today's Children Could Use a Little Tough Love: Learning from the Past

Parents never used to read parenting books or worry about being "perfect parents" raising "perfect kids." They loved their children and just did the best they could. They set limits, disciplined when needed, lectured frequently, and made kids earn their way in the home and in life. They weren't afraid of letting their kids handle their own boredom, disappointments, frustrations, battles and failures. They let their kids grow up and out of their homes. Parents today could learn from the tough love lessons parents used to teach:

1. Life is difficult. Life in our home won't always be easy. Learning how to handle both your bad days, disappointments and failures and your victories, successes and celebrations is an important lesson.

2. You won' like all of our decisions. We'll listen to you, but you will not always get your way. No sales person or child sells them all. Don' use what other parents do. You live in our home, and as long as you do, we promise not to spoil you by treating you like parents who do! After all, as parents, we'd rather be respected than liked.

3. Parents aren't butlers or maids! For a family to go smoothly, everyone must learn to contribute. You'll have chores until you leave home. If you work too much to do your chores, a portion of your paycheck may be used to defray the cost of making up for the chores you don't do. If you can get a better deal, live there!

4. Our money is not your money. We worked our way through school and careers to earn the house, vacations and possessions we have. By learning what it means to earn your own money and save for things you want, you'll be better prepared for life. So, even when we can, don't expect us to buy you everything.

5. If you are bored, that's your choice! It's not our job to schedule your life, entertain you, rescue you from boredom or ensure your happiness. There's never nothing to do; choose from the vast array of choices you've been blessed with by just living in America.

6. We support teachers, preachers and police officers. We won't automatically take your side against people in authority.  When a teacher says behave, behave. When you treat those in authority with respect; most will do the same with you. Outside of evidence of downright abuse, we'll side with responsible adults. When a police officer stops you, pull over and be polite. If you get in trouble as a result of your actions, blaming your friends won't work. You're responsible for you, no matter what others do.

7. Find your gifts and develop them to achieve realistic dreams. Not all dreams are realistic. All the dreaming in the world won't make everyone soar like Kobe Bryant! Life is about admitting your weaknesses, identifying your gifts, working hard to develop those gifts, and then finding a way to use your strengths to make a living and a satisfying life. Don't settle for copying others! We're looking forward to watching you use your unique gifts to achieve your own dreams! 

8. True self-confidence is earned not given! Some adults may flatter you for just breathing. Even though we'll love you forever, we love you enough not to shower you with empty praise. True optimism comes from a track record of hard work in overcoming obstacles. Confidence comes from bouncing back from disappointments on the way to achieving successes you can be proud of. We'll let you earn your confidence the old-fashioned way-by hard work.

9. Take you life seriously, but yourself lightly. Instead of viewing everything as a crisis, learn to laugh a little. Someday, even your most embarrassing moments are going to be great stories worth laughing about. Why wait? Learn to laugh every day!

10. Your father and mother know more than you think! Don't believe everything you learn in school or see on television. Parents aren't stupid. Yes, you have a mind and will increasingly be given more choices, but we have experience, common sense and wisdom that we've earned on the way to becoming parents. Get used to a few lectures. You may not listen now, but you'll appreciate many of those lectures later in life.

Finally, know that we love you more than anything in life. We love you enough to give you limits, say "no," discipline you, lecture you, hug you even when you don't want to be seen with us, take you to church, ground you, send you to your room, applaud your successes, hold you when you hurt, and get even with you when we get to be grandparents to your children. 

Byline: This column first appeared November 12, 2007 in the Ventura County Star. Dr. Terry Paulson is a psychologist, speaker, author and host to the PoliticalTalk Blog. Contact him at www.politicalassessment.com or at terry@terrypaulson.com.

Community Spirit Alive and Well

In the last few days, I have come to appreciate over and over again that the American Dream is still built on enduring but simple principles, men and women of strong character and caring communities. Every culture changes, but the best societies find a way to endure. With the right mix of tradition and change, each generation must then test anew great American principles against today's uncharted choices. In short, we must again affirm what it is to be uniquely American.

As we begin 2007, I'm both optimistic about our future and appreciative of the rich foundation past generations have provided. That optimism has been reinforced by a mosaic of recent experiences-two inspiring movies, the death of a President, a Boise State victory and a Christmas Day in the ER.

Two movies, one a blockbuster and another a limited-release gem, remind us that the American Dream must be earned, and it can still be earned today.

Out of Minnesota, Ali Selim's first feature film, "Sweet Land," seduces you with simple truths and authentic characters who are tested to reveal inner strength and beauty. The simple story captures the rugged and challenging life of Norwegian immigrants as they forge their way in a new land.

Young Inge travels from Europe after World War I to marry a man she has never met, a Norwegian farmer named Olaf. Inge is the dream mail-order bride, but her German heritage and lack of proper immigration papers create a difficult challenge for the sturdy, quiet Olaf.

Their longing for love, the strength of deep and heartfelt friendships, the pain of local prejudices, and the struggle to earn the American Dream are played out in a way that makes you wish the movie would never end.

Reminding us that the American Dream is still alive, Will Smith brings a stirring performance to "Pursuit of Happyness." The movie dramatizes the inspiring, true story of Chris Gardner as a down-but-not-out salesman who does what it takes to care for his son and find his way to success.

As a struggling single parent, Chris nurtures his "can do" spirit and secures a prestigious stock brokerage internship. His refusal to give up, his love for his son and his innovative strategies to succeed give testimony to the fact that America can still deliver on dreams when people work hard to achieve them.

Models matter! The litany of tributes on the passing of President Gerald Ford reinforces another American value-we want to believe that any American can grow up to become President. President Ford didn't just champion mainstream American values; he lived them. As an All-American center for the University of Michigan, his hand was involved in every offensive play, but he let others get the credit for the victories.

At a time the partisan vitriol could have torn the country apart, President Ford put forgiveness and healing ahead of his own political interest. Character was more important than ambition, common sense more useful than experts, and getting along never required compromising principles.

By honoring him, we truly honor the American values that helped create him. He was the consummate American, a humble but capable man of quiet integrity, common sense and compassion.

President Ford's Michigan connection aside, USC's Rose Bowl victory over Michigan was a joy, but it was Boise State's Fiesta Bowl victory over Oklahoma that inspired me as an American.

Undefeated Boise State was a real-life "Rocky," the underdogs who play the whole game, take it to the big dogs, and earn an overtime victory no one gave them a chance to win. As they had done all year long, they believed in themselves and delivered on their dream. Like great Americans of any age-Boise State Broncos never, ever give up! On that day, they were America's team!   

The American Dream requires more than individual excellence; it's nurtured by a caring community. When circumstances left my wife and I spending five hours of our Christmas Day in the Los Robles Medical Center ER, we experienced first hand what makes America great-it's the values and compassion of average Americans.

The waiting room housed a variety of ailments-a scratched eye, abdominal pains, bleeding wounds and more than a few cases of stomach flu. There was enough pain, disappointment, frustration, and boredom for all, but there was also a spirit of community. On this memorable Christmas, everyone willingly waited as people with more life-threatening emergencies were treated. They reached out to console one another.

Not to be outdone, the Los Robles staff did their best to bring joy to their work. Many were wearing Christmas smocks; most brought a warm smile and a calming touch. Yes, community still happens in America!

Recent polls show that most Americans are optimistic about the future, and so am I. As we start this year, may we count our blessings and renew a commitment to the values that have made America great. After all, "E Pluribus Unum," out of many we remain one. We are Americans! 

Byline: Dr. Terry Paulson is a psychologist, speaker, author and host to the PoliticalTalk Blog. Contact him at http://www.politicalassessment.com or at terry@terrypaulson.com. First printed in, "Community Spirit Alive and Well," Ventura County Star, 1-15-07, B-6.

A Father's Day Message in Support of Dads, Men…and Boys

Terry Paulson, "Celebrating Differences: As Father's Day Nears, It's Time for a Male Pep Talk," Ventura County Star, June 12, 2006, B-6.

As a dad, husband, man, son and former boy, I confess that though I thoroughly appreciate, value and love women, I, like many men, have no desire to be expected to be like them. Thankfully, numerous studies have revealed what most have presumed without research—men and women have different hormones, wiring, strengths, and God-given equipment.

After years of being told by feminists and their academic allies that there’s no difference, it’s time for a men and women to celebrate their differences instead of denying them. If men are still holding women back, men aren’t doing a very good job. Women now make up the majority of undergraduate students and receive the majority of masters degrees. After deciding to skip the “glass ceiling,” women-owned businesses are doing quite well. There are more people working for women owned businesses today than for the Fortune 500. Women are doing just fine in America. 

So in the shadow of Father’s Day, it’s time for a male pep talk. After all, men have mental and physical strengths worth celebrating. Although there are certainly some feminine exceptions, men have some advantages in doing physically demanding and dangerous jobs. Although men make up a little more than 50 percent of the workforce, they represent 92 percent of workplace deaths. Men do the dirty and dangerous jobs; few women are clamoring to become coal miners.

Men not only have a physical advantage; they have a temperament that makes them ideal for combat. When faced with duty to defend their country or their family, more men are ready and physically equipped to fight.

Not all men’s gifts are life-threatening. Men can go to the bathroom without a support group. Men can visit a friend without having to bring a little gift, and you won’t hear a man say, “Oh, I’m so embarrassed. There’s another man with the same suit!”

Most men don’t like to shop. That's why the men's department is two inches from the first floor door. As focused hunters, the faster they find the desired item, the happier they are. After all, men can last a year with an all-season wardrobe consisting of one wallet, one suit, four shirts, two ties, three pairs of shoes and one six pack of Fruit of the Loom underwear. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe even decades. Men never have to ask friends, "So, notice anything different?"

Most men like to fix things, build things and complete things. They love the satisfaction of getting closure and bragging about what they’ve done. Men love purchasing seldom used tools so that, when needed, we’re ready to fix anything that might break.

Moms are into bonding with their children; they’re more compassionate, forgiving and nurturing. Men more often stress accountability, discipline, self-reliance and changing the locks when the kids finally leave home. Fathers feel a duty to provide and protect their families that women can count on.

Most women are introspective: "Are we still in love? Is my marriage emotionally fulfilling?"  Most men are outrospective: "Did the Lakers win? Did I get the sale?” Men don’t like to talk about problems with women because they fear falling into an endless analysis of the past, present and future. After all, Men use an average of 20-30,000 words a day while women use 45-65,000 words a day. We run out of words faster than women!

While women can ruminate with their women friends for hours, at the first sign of personal problems, men are more likely to distract themselves by playing poker, watching TV or having a game of pickup basketball with the guys. After playing off their frustrations, men come back ready to take on their problems alone! Even when talking might be constructive, they seldom ask for help but will tell you how tough the struggle was once they’re done!

Now, this is not to minimize how women make men better. Married men are less likely to join gangs; their women won’t let them. Women temper men’s tempers, expand men’s emotion-laden vocabulary and teach men lessons of civility. Men call that maturity; women call it good training! Finally, women give men the sense of completion and purpose that men crave by marrying them and giving men families. Men try to reciprocate by providing for the family, opening doors, complimenting women when they look great and, of course, fixing things.

By the way, without waiting for feminists to tell them, most men won’t settle for anyone making their daughters, mothers or wives victims. They believe in the girls and women in their lives and want them to dream their own dreams and use their gifts. Most men will do anything to make sure nothing stops the women they love from becoming what they were meant to be.

Even though we as men know our strengths, we also know our limitations. We need women. When Mark Twain was once asked, “In a world without women what would men become?” Twain rightly responded, “Scarce, sir. Mighty scarce.”

Byline: Dr. Terry Paulson is a psychologist, speaker, author and host to the PoliticalTalk Blog. Contact him at http://www.politicalassessment.com or at terry@terrypaulson.com.